I'm in a Creative Writing class this semester and I have to write a short story or poem every week, so I thought I'd post them. They're really amateur and I know it. But I have no shame and I've been falling behind in my blogging duties. So here goes!
My Button
There is a button on my jacket named Herald Wilkenshire III I consider him a close friend of mine on account he follows me everywhere I go But recently I've been noticing something strange I think Herald's mad at me
I don't think he wants to be friends anymore because he's been loosening up and now he's only holding on by one little string one teeny tiny string separating him and the ground I tried to tell him not to go I told him I'm sorry for whatever I did but he won't talk to me I fear he may fall any day now and when he does I'll miss him dearly I hope he writes me letters from wherever he goes I bet you two quarters he's headed to Canada that's where my dad told me people go when they run away But I'm pretty sure I'll get a letter eventually on account we were close friends and all Maybe I'll visit him in Canada, I mean.
My "poems" which are usually more like children's stories passed off as poetry, are definitely so much more cutesy than the really deep, and often abstract, poems that are read in class. I'm up for my first workshop this week. I hope people don't tear it up!
A couple followers had been asking for a Jersey Shore post like forever ago. Laura kept saying that she would do it, but we all know she sucks! This post is way overdue because the first season had already ended. But you can catch marathons on MTV.
Anyway, I love this show! It is bad TV at its best. These people are the most ridiculous characters, and I love each and every one of them from their crazy hair down to their Fred Flintstone toes. They are too good to be real. But man, they are real, unfortunately for society and fortunately for me.
Everyone kept telling me that I had to check out Jersey Shore. I hadn't watched MTV in years and frankly didn't want to start up again. I finally caved and had to find out what the fuss was all about. I remember it was late on a weekend, maybe around 1am. I saw that it was playing on MTV. So I thought I'd watch an episode and then go to bed. During the first few minutes, I was like this is total crap and the people on the show are gross, superficial jackasses. Fast forward an hour and a half later, I watched three episodes. Haha.
Side note: That night, I also saw the most hilarious infomercial for this exercise product called Shake Weight. In the commercial, these women were holding onto this vibrating dumbbell in the most provocative and graphic way. It looked like they were giving a HJ and enjoying it A LOT. WTF is that all that about?!? It was disturbing and kinda awesome. Because it was one in the morning, I saw that same infomercial like 20 times. Check it out here. So my MTV watching experience was memorable to say the least.
Since that time, I think I've watched every Jersey Shore episode. If you've never seen any episodes or heard of the show, it follows eight people who call themselves guidos and guidettes at the New Jersey shore. They are all Italians and live a unique lifestyle that includes lots of flash, sex, tanning, and hair gel. And there is always drama and lots of fights. Lots. Pure gold!
Jersey Shore Vocabulary
The way they talk also puts this show on a whole other level. It's like they have their own language. Here are some of their terms that we should all include in our daily vernacular:
Battle: A dance off between two or more people at a club in which all participants go wild and anything goes.
Creeping or Creep Mode: Seeking girls/guys with whom to hook up. Usually done at a club where there is plenty of alcohol. But creeping can really be done anywhere like on the street, tanning salon, and beach.
Fist pumping: A motion in which you pump your fist repeatedly in the air, the faster the better. Done at clubs when the music is bumping.
Gorillas: Guys who are super tan and muscular, preferably through steroid use, i.e., juiced.
Grenade: The less attractive friend who the wingman takes in sacrifice for his friend who wants to hook-up with the hot friend. It follows the analogy that dating/creeping is war.
Robbery: To steal a girl that another guy had just been creeping on. Doesn't matter if the other guy already swapped spit with her. It's all good in the hood.
Stage 5 Clinger: A serious stalker who you can't seem to shake off. You just keep seeing her/him everywhere you go.
Jersey Shore Cast
Mike "The Situation" - He likes to show off his six-pack abs, which he calls "The Situation." Hence his nickname. His daily routine is GTL, which means Gym Tanning Laundry. He believes that you must always look fresh before a night out, so he showers, shaves, and changes his shirt at the very last minute. He is fresh until death. You can find him creeping on girls 24/7. He is never not in creep mode even after a certain female roommate just got punched in the face. He is a total man whore.
Pauly D - A DJ and also The Situation's wingman who had to jump on a couple grenades. He sports a blowout, which is a hair style that needs at least 45 minutes prep time, lots of gel and hairspray, and a blow dryer and that doesn't move and can last in any situation.
Ronnie - He is the gorilla of the house but a big ol' softie. He promised that he would never fall in love at the shore but unexpectedly felt a connection with Sammi. He committed a robbery and stole Sammi from The Situation. However, Sammi and Ronnie have a rocky relationship and literally had their first of many fights not 24 hours after hooking up.
Vinny - He is a cute 21-year-old mama's boy who has never been away from home before. I kinda have a cougar crush on him. He is the least sluttiest of the guidos, but that isn't saying much. He is also the best fist-pumper. Go Vinny, go Vinny!
Jenni "JWOWW" - Huge boobs, fake nails, low-cut shirts, and hair extensions. Her nickname comes from the sound guys make when they first set eyes on her. She loves her boyfriend but can't help flirting with Pauly D. So she doesn't cheat on her boyfriend, she eats ham and drinks water.
Nicole "Snooki" - A short guidette who wears the infamous "pouf" to give her some height. On the first day, she came on to strong and was "on the outcast." However, her roommates immediately warmed up to her after a guy at a bar punched her in the face. She also likes pickles a lot and eats them by sucking out the juice first. Yum.
Sammi "Sweetheart" - She's a self-proclaimed "sweetest bitch you'll ever meet." She was first flirting with The Situation and totally played him. On the same night she hooked up with The Situation, she made a move on Ronnie.
Angelina - She left after the first episode or so. I don't know much about her except that she is a complete bitch and knows it.
Jersey Shore Quotes
Here are some awesome quotes from your favorite quidos and quidettes. It was very hard to pick the best ones. There are so many good ones.
Vinny: Guys with the blow-outs and the fake tans, and guys that wear lip gloss and makeup, those aren't guidos, those are retards.
Ronnie: I regret that I got caught. I don't regret that I hit the kid, because he had it coming.
Pauly D: We’re beatin’-up-the-beat, that’s what we say when we’re doing our fist pump. First, we start off by banging the ground, we’re banging it as the beat builds ‘cause that beat’s hittin’ us so we’re fightin’ back, it’s like we beat up that beat.
Snooki: That's why I don't eat lobster or anything like that cause they're alive when you kill it.
The Situation: I was thinkin' heavy fire and I didn't wear my bulletproof vest and I just don't know if I'm gonna make it."
Sammi: [to JWOWW] I yanked some bitch's hair for you.
JWoww: I guess I'm single, I don't know. If I am we got a problem on our hands. I'll show my true side ... my true, dirty, f*%king filthy side.
Angelina: I feel like this is beneath me. I’m a bartender. I do great things.
I recently developed a random obsession with candles. What am I? In college again?? I never really liked them before. I don't know how it started. I first got one Yankee candle from Bed Bath and Beyond. Oooo, I have a million 20% off coupons. I should use them, I thought. I bought one that smelled like jasmine. And for the next couple of weeks, my house smelled like heaven. Then on Black Friday, I found a Yankee candle outlet store and bought two more candles. Since then, I've bought three more.
It's an addiction. I inhale deeply every time. It's my drug. Haha.
Caribbean Escape. Island Margarita. Juicy Watermelon. Midnight Jasmine. Those are all my candle scents. Don't they sound yummy? Like you wanna eat 'em.
Then, the black out happened during the last snow storm. And I actually needed all those candles. Haha. See! I was meant to buy all those ridiculously expensive and usually useless things. They were really handy at the time.
I should probably get my obsession out of the way before I have any kids. Because I probably shouldn't have open flame around babies. Right? I think I read that somewhere.
What the heck were in those brownies, you ask? Real fudge, cocoa, organic cane sugar, and flecks of gold? No, none of that actually. (And no, they were not "special" brownies either. Haha.) I wish I could say I made some spectacular gourmet brownies. But no, they were from a box, and they cost me lots of time and money. In the end, they were totally worth it...okay, not really. But they were still delicious.
Huz's birthday was last month, and all he asked for were brownies on his birthday. That night, I checked our cabinets, and the only box of brownies left was expired. I didn't make it, of course, though I did contemplate it for a second. In the end, I threw that box out. I felt like a terrible wife. So I vowed to make it up to him.
In anticipation of Valentine's Day, I made sure to buy two boxes. That day, while I was making the brownies, I remembered I had thrown our old metal pan away. All I had was a white ceramic pan, which I have never used for baking brownies and cakes before. But I figured it should work. Well, it totally ruined my brownies! They were undercooked and really gross. Huz wouldn't even eat it. So that batch was thrown out.
I finally got around to buying a new 9x13 metal pan. This past Saturday, I thought I'd surprise Huz and make brownies for him. I prepared them while he was still sleeping. The smell of chocolate wafted through the house. It even woke Huz up. He came down, and the first thing he said was "I smell chocolate." No "good morning" or "Hello, my love." Hmph.
After the brownies were done, I cut into them to give Huz a piece. And it was as hard as a rock! WTF. I looked at the directions and realized I looked at the wrong time. It didn't even have directions for a 9x13 pan like the other brownie mix did. I overcooked them! How the heck did this happen again?!? I threw it away today. And it was one giant hard rectangular cookie. Ugh!
Huz kept saying how I was toying with his emotions. Getting his hopes up and dashing them with shit brownies. (Not literally.)
Enough was enough! I was going to make brownies even if it killed me! Yesterday I bought another pan, but this time a 9x9. Bought two more boxes of brownies. Read the directions like ten times.
I finally made brownies that were edible today. Yay me! It only took a month, four boxes of brownies, and two new pans.
Huz and I had an awesome date night. They are too few and far between, unfortunately. I was so proud of myself because: (1) I planned the whole thing, (2) we got out of the house, and (3) it was a success! We went out on the town, ate dinner, and caught a comedy show. We ate good food and laughed our ass off. So it was pretty much a perfect night.
I heard that John Heffron was in town and was performing at the local comedy club. We watched him on Last Comic Standing several years ago and really liked him. His jokes usually relate to relationships and marriage. Stuff we totally get. He is soooo funny. Love him. His jokes are so relatable. His jokes/observations are so true! He made this one joke that totally happened between me and Huz. Here is our real conversation:
Tara: You never ever refill the paper towels! I always have to do it. Who do you think refills it? Why do you think we never run out?
Huz: It's magic.
Heffron said his wife asked him the exact same question, and his answer was a magic elf. Haha! Hilarious. Check him out.
We were also pleasantly surprised by the opening act, Ryan Hamilton. He reminds me of Seinfeld a little. He was so funny that I was worried that John Heffron won't be able to measure up. But both acts were so great. Check Ryan out.
I just finished my first assignment in my Words & Image class this semester. I had to create a cable station and make 5 logos, tying words and image together into one cohesive design. I like children so I made a station especially for them! Polka Dot Baby TV!
Enjoy!FYI: I draw all my designs myself onto Adobe Illustrator. No scanning, no tracing. :)
And the first two designs are no particular font. I drew the letters myself!
Tina and I were at this recent get-together and saw this guy who we don't really know and rarely even talked to. The first thing he said when he saw us was, "wow, you guys look exactly alike. I can't tell you apart." Then he continued to stare at us like we were a freak show. It was awkward.
While eying the both of us, he commented how we had the same exact hair. Um, no, we don't!
Then he said we dressed the same. What?? Clearly, you don't know us at all! So please be quiet right now!
Then he proceeded to play the guessing game. Which one is Tina? Which one is Tara? Ooooo. What fun!
NO. Not fun. Annoying. Really annoying. The last time we were subjected to this was when we were 7. And guess what. It wasn't fun then either.
I remember when many an uncle and auntie would visit our family. Tina and I mostly didn't know who they were and just wanted to be left alone to play. However, these uncles and aunties would come up to us and try to guess who was who. They'd laugh thinking they were sooooo original and funny. Also, if they guessed the names correctly, sometimes they liked to explain how they figured it out. I hated this part because then they would comment about how my face was chubbier or my frame was bigger. Gee...thanks.
That's not really the reason why it is annoying. I'll tell you why. Yes, I realize we look alike. Yes, it's adorable and fascinating at the same time. However, we don't really think we look much alike. People who know us well don't have any problem telling us apart. So if you don't know us, then why does it matter which one is Tina and which one is Tara? Really in the end, they are just two names for two twins you won't remember tomorrow anyway.
The guessing game is also stupid. There's no real winner. It's over before it began. Here are the possible outcomes of the game: - If you get it right: Yay, you are great at guessing because, let's be honest, you had no idea who was who. And you won't remember anyway. We'll always be TaraTina to you. - If you get it wrong, then yay, we tricked you with our twin power! Haha, you fool. But do try again later. Or not. Preferably not.
If you can't tell us apart, just keep it on the DL. You are just going to embarrass yourself. Because hey, I didn't know your name either, but I didn't say anything. I didn't go....oh, what's your name? Is it Bob? Tony? Joey? Yes, because then I would be guessing. And that, my friend, would be dumb.
Google is everywhere. It has taken over everything. It's so huge that it became a verb! It is a search engine, blog host, an electronic map, and photo album/sharer. Now Google is looking to get a piece of the social networking action. Last week Google was very excited to launch Buzz to compete with the likes of Facebook and MySpace. Except there was a hiccup. A huge one. And thus can be considered, as Laura would say, an EPIC FAIL.
Last week, when 37 million people signed onto their gmail accounts, they got automatically signed up with Buzz. Probably like most people, I didn't even really think about it. I saw a window that asked if I wanted to check out the new Buzz or just go to my gmail. I just clicked onto gmail, not realizing that I just joined Buzz.
That is not even the worse part. I found out from reading this article that Buzz reviews your contact list and compiles a list of people who you email the most. Then you automatically become their follower. Then they can view everyone I am supposedly following and even get their email addresses. WTF! I don't want people seeing who I contact the most. I don't want people getting my friends' emails without their permission.
I can think of so many ramifications to this. What if I order sex toys or porn through email all the time? What if I had a strange disease and was emailing a specialist about it? What if I was having an affair? What if I had famous friends? (Yeah right.) What if I had criminals for friends? (Like my drug dealer. Haha. Jk.)
This is such an evasion of privacy. It's ridiculous. How did Google think this was okay? Facebook does crap like this, not Google. Now it is in trouble with the Electronic Privacy Information Center (EPIC). And I'm sure many gmail users are pissed off.
Okay, so here's what you've all been waiting for so eagerly. My interview with Tina! She said it was totally awesome so I hope our readers aren't disappointed!
1. If aliens beamed down to Earth and threatened to kill everyone if you did not offer a sacrifice, who would you most readily hand over?
You are not being specific. Does it have to be someone I know? 'Cause that's easy. You. hehe. If not, I'll pick Jon Lovitz 'cause I find him so annoying. Albeit, he hasn't really been in any movies recently, but he's still annoying. Who is a fan of his? Who?!? For those who don't know who I'm talking about. Good, you're lucky. And I can't even think of any good movies he was in anyway. He was on the show, NewsRadio. He replaced Phil Hartman! Big mistake! Who replaces a great like Phil Hartman with Jon Lovitz. Who? I hope Jon Lovitz isn't dead, or I'll feel bad, a little.
2. If you had a Bucketlist, what would be #1?
Take a tour of Europe or learn a musical instrument. Couldn't think of anything interest, but good question.
3. If you woke up and followed a rabbit down a hole and entered the world of Alice in Wonderland, would you assume it was a dream, think it was real, or would you think "Oh, I guess I finally ate those shrooms"? Would it be the weirdest dream you've ever had or have you had weirder?
I would say a dream because I have had some weird dreams before, but admittedly I usually know I'm dreaming. I have to say Alice in Wonderland used to scare me when I was little. I hate being lost, but being lost in a strange place with a freaky cat, now that's scary. *Shiver* I had a dream that it was the end of the world and everybody was celebrating like it was New Year's. But I have had weirder dreams and recurring at that. I always have dreams where I'm being chased and it's like a horror movie where I try to hide under cars in a parking lot. They always find you and you can't run fast 'cause in dreams, you're really slow and your muscles won't work.
4. If you could rob a bank and never get caught, would you do it?
Totally! Yeah, but I won't be greedy. I'll just grab like $100,000. Also because a million dollars will probably be really heavy.
5. Do you believe in the supernatural? or aliens?
I believe in aliens but they probably are light years away in a different galaxy. I can't believe that ours is the only world that could possibly have life on it. I also think aliens probably look a lot like us because we're made so anatomically perfect. As for supernatural...too scared so don't want to believe in it.
6. If you could kidnap one celebrity, who would it be and what the heck are you going to do with him/her, you psychopath?
Hmmm...I probably would kidnap Rob Pattison and hide him in my attic and make him be my boyfriend. HAHA. Laura, what a sick question. No, I'll probably kidnap him for a date and then let him go. And maybe make him play music and sing to me. But just for a day.
7. What do you think it'd be like if your daughters were a part of your classroom?
I'll probably coddle them all day. I might even carry Rachel around while I teach. Carmen, of course, would be my star pupil. She'll hang onto my every word and not give me an ounce of trouble. They'll probably be the teacher's helpers all day long. Sigh...I actually sometimes play the "what if" game. What if I had 20 Carmens in my class? Wouldn't it be wonderful? When I read a story, all 20 Carmens will actually listen? When I give work, they'll do it and follow directions. A teacher's dream.
8. If you could live in the world of any television show or movie, which would you choose?
I'll choose Grey's Anatomy because I always wanted to be a doctor. And eventually I might end up with McDreamy or McSteamy or maybe become a lesbian. (Reference to the show, not my desire to become a lesbian.)
9. If you were to become a vampire, do you think you would enjoy drinking blood and killing people? We won't judge.
No, I'll be like Edward Cullen and brood all the time until I find the love of my life. Or maybe I'll be like Angel and kill vampires to satisfy my killer instinct. But the cool thing about being a vampire is that I'll be myself but a much hotter version.
10. If a Ninja Turtle, the Hulk, and a zombie were to corner you in an alleyway, in what progression would you take each out and how?
First the zombie because I don't want to be bitten. Being a zombie is not pretty. Then the Ninja Turtle with my awesome sidekick. Lastly the Hulk because he probably would've calmed down by then because the Ninja Turtle and zombie were probably infuriating him. Just a kick in Bruce Banner's nuts will probably knock him out cold 'cause that guys a wimp. He's just a physicist.
Valentine's Day. A day for lovahs. Huz asked me to marry him four year ago on Valentine's Day. Not because it's a special day for us. But because he knows that I don't really care for it. And wouldn't expect a proposal on that day. That sneaky bastard. Really, I think Valentine's Day are for young or new couples. Not couples like us who have been together for over thirteen years.
But don't get me wrong. I love Valentine's Day...not the actual day. But the day after when all the Valentine's stuff goes on sale. I love that sh*t. Heart shaped things. In pinks and reds. Love this and love that. Awesome. I am so into it. I went shopping today just to get Valentine's Day stuff on sale. I got some great stuff. Love it!
I found a 50% off sale at Target. I got a cute set of bowls for only $7.50, a three-layer candle for $4, and chocolate covered cherries and strawberries for $2.5.
At Old Navy, I bought pajama pants for $3.99 and two shorts for $2.99 each. Lots of hearts! Yay. They are so adorable, aren't they?
And they are all for me from me. Heart shaped things are exactly what I wanted!! Happy Valentine's Day to meeeee!!!
Readers Beware, what you are about to read cannot be revoked. Side Effects are nausea, stomach cramps, vertigo, explosive diarrhea, temporary blindness, and in some rare cases spontaneous human combustion.
Ready or not. Here's my interview with Tara. Tina: What lie can you finally confess to? Or what lies have you told?
Tara: I can tell you, but then I have to kill you. Haha. Why do you assume I tell lies? How impertinent! Okay, on September 11, 2000, I lied to my employer and told them I was sick. In reality, Huz and I played hooky to celebrate our fourth anniversary. When I came into work the next day, a co-worker blatantly accused me of lying but was also half-kidding. I went beet red and tried to act as innocent as possible. But I really am a terrible liar. I have been holding that in for so long. I feel like a weight has been lifted.
Tina: If you could have an unusual talent, what would it be?
Tara: I wish I could play the harmonica. So when I am feeling down, I can pull it out and express my sadness through music. Then everyone would know I got the blues when they hear my harmonica. That would be cool as sh*t.
Tina: When you're in the dark, what things might you imagine?
Tara: This question is aptly current because we lost power yesterday. So our whole house was pitch black. As it became darker and darker and we were losing light in certain parts of the house, I started thinking of that movie Pitch Black. And how we had to get into the light as fast as we can. Then later I followed Huz upstairs and was in the hallway while he was in the bedroom. And suddenly, I thought of that scene from I Am Legend where all the zombies were huddled in that one room. Then I imagined Huz as a zombie racing toward me to eat my brains. Then the next second, as if he read my mind, he ran toward me all zombie -like and freaked me out. He is a big meanie!
Tina: What is something you are ashamed of liking/loving? (not including Huz)
Tara: I am ashamed of loving them young'uns on TV and movies. As I get older, celebrities seem to get younger and younger…and also hotter and hotter. Taylor Lautner in New Moon. Sigh. Zac Efron in 17 Again. Kill me now. Here is the most embarrassing confession of all. I was over at Tina’s house a while ago, and the kids were watching this show on the Disney Channel called the Wizards of Waverly Place. As soon as I saw the teenage son, I was like Who is that?? He is friggin’ adorable. I was not kidding either. I was trying to hide my shame as best I can. I didn’t want to say anything in front of the kiddies. But when I got a chance, I told Tina I thought he was cute. Haha. I had to tell someone. The kiddies would just look at me weird considering they are only 4 and 7.
Tina: What movie can you watch over and over again? What movie (if played over and over) would literally make you gouge your eyes out?
Tara: This question is hard because there are soooo many good movies. But I know I would watch 50 First Dates again and again because I’ve done it. During vacation one time, it was rerunning on HBO or something. And I just sat there and watched it back to back. Haha. Other movies would be Bridget Jones’ Diary, 10 Things I Hate About You, and You’ve Got Mail. Classics and awesome!
A movie that makes me want to gouge my eyes out whether I watch it once or 50 times is Eragon! OMG, that movie is soooo bad. It’s a shame because the books are sooooo good. Poor poor Eragon…what the hellz did they do to you? That movie sucks balls!
Tina: Would you rather live in a world of vampires, zombies, or ghosts? Why?
Tara: Ghosts??! Hell no! And I actually do think we live in a world with ghosts. I’m just glad I don’t see them. So the question is really between vampires and zombies. I guess zombies because you can destroy zombies easier than vampires. And vampires can infiltrate the human world, and that is scary.
Tina: If you could invent something to make your life easier, what would you invent?
Tara: A teleporter!! No need for cars, airplanes, and the like. I can save travel time and go anywhere I want in a second. Plus, it will save lives because there will be no accidents!! Yay!
Tina: If you could change something about Huz, what would it be?
Tara: But he is perfect!!
Oh, he’s gone now. Actually, I wish Huz was more handy. He does not do manual labor. You can tell by his soft hands...softer than mine.
Tina: What is something you hate about your personality?
Tara: Hate? That’s a strong word. I like who I am. But if I have to say something, I hate that I am kind of a control freak. I like things done immediately and in a certain way. But I try not to be too annoying about it…but I really do have to force myself to be more conscious of it. Like if Huz is cooking something or cleaning something, I always have to say how he is doing it wrong. Hehe.
Tina: Where's the beef? Or Name 3 material things you can't live without.
Tara: That’s easy! TV, car, and cell phone. Duh. For obvious reasons. But if I can’t choose the obvious things, I guess I would say my wedding rings, leggings, and dresses.
Ok, looks like we learned a little more about Tara. Maybe a little too much. I don't know about you, but I wish I could take back the image of Tara drooling over the teenage boy in "Wizards of Waverly Place." And also the knowledge that Huz has freakishly soft hands, or maybe I'm just jealous. Watch out for the third and last installment of the Q & A, where I get interviewed. It's totally awesome!!!
Just for fun, I gave Tina and Laura an assignment for our blog. As a result, Tina called me the blog nazi. They just don't like it when I order them around. They are not very good minions. Haha. I may suffer for that one.
I had the idea that we would interview each other. Ask any ten questions and hopefully get comprehensible and interesting answers. Also, in the process, we can learn more about each other. And so can you. Isn't that funness to the nth degree? I think so.
I got to interview Laura and could ask her anything I wanted. Her answers are in purple, which is her fav color btw.
1. Tell me one of your really weird habits that I don’t even know about.
When I listen to music, I often tap both my big toes like they're drumming. Not even joking.
2. What do you think is your most irritating trait? And don’t say you don’t have any.
Hm, this one took a lot of thought. I decided it's that I like full control of the remote, and when people want to watch something I don't like, I am forced to physically hurt them. Luckily, my boyfriend isn't the least bit picky. :)
3. Tell me one of your embarrassing moments. Not very original but what the hey.
One time in 7th grade, I had a cold. It wasn't so bad that I felt sick, my nose was just running like crazy. And during class I sneezed into my lap and seriously a huge waterfall of boogies blew out onto my Catholic school uniform. It was still connected to my nose. It was just one huge rope of boogers from nose to skirt. Doesn't it just make you hungry?
4. What is your favorite thing about being an artist?
That I have such freedom to create and I can be anything I want. I could do graphic design, I could sell dolls, I could illustrate children books, etc. I can do anything with my skill, and not a lot of people can say that. And also my work is fun. I get to draw and color all day and get paid! Another thing is I like kids, and I like when my children's stories or drawings make them happy. Sorry, I know you wanted one answer. Hehe.
5. Even though you are fabulously fashionable now, you weren’t always. What fashion trend did you follow that you are now really embarrassed about?
Haha. I have a pretty crazy fashion history. I was ghetto fabulous, pink and overly girly, punk rock, nerdy. I don't regret any of them!
6. If you could pull off any kind of couture, what would you choose? It must be something you don’t normally wear.
I think those huge dresses are cool. You know, the avante-garde stuff on Project Runway. The dresses with the crazy ribbons and lace! I would also chop my hair off like Rihanna, because she's super cool. And I want crazy colorful over-the-top eye make up.
7. What is the one thing your boyfriend does that always makes you laugh? How about cry?
Recently, I've only really noticed his dimples. Sometimes I go, "dimples!" and he has to smirk to show them to me. It makes me happy. So happy, I cry with joy. Hah! I killed two birds with one molecular disassemblement machine. Wait, that's not right? Why the hell would I throw a rock at a bird??
8. If you could only eat five foods in the world for the rest of your life, what would they be? Be really specific and don’t worry about health issues.
Chocolate fudge brownie ice cream, fried rice, bananas, chicken pot pie, and pickles
9. Name three things that you absolutely detest in this world. They could be anything.
Prejudice, when people don't wash their hands after they use a public bathroom, and whipped cream
10. Would you rather this world being taken over by zombies, vampires, werewolves, or aliens?
Aliens, because it would be cool to see what they'd look like. I already know what zombies, vampires, and werewolves look like! Besides, I could easily find a radioactive spider to give me the skills to kill any of these creatures. Easy!
Unlike Tara, who was having a nightmare of a time during the blizzard weekend, my girls and I were enjoying our snow day. Carmen had an idea to make an igloo. Well, with my help, we made a double room snow house with a connecting tunnel. Carmen actually did the one section and I continued on even after both my girls lost interest. Hehe. Adults should get to have fun too. Afterward, I made both of them crawl through the tunnel in between. Hey, I worked so hard they better at least try it. I think I should get a real estate agent to list this snow house for me.
Listing: Beautiful snow house in prime location. Newly built and move-in condition; ready for home buyers. Two bedrooms, no bathrooms, outhouse available upon request. Open house: February 10th, during snowstorm. Property won't last so hurry!
Huz went away on his yearly snowboard trip and was supposed to be back home yesterday. His flight got canceled, and whenever he changed his flight, that would be canceled. So it was a nightmare.
In any case, I had to shovel our car out, so, when he did eventually come back, I could go pick him up from the airport. I WAS NOT looking forward to that part. I did not want to shovel snow by myself. But I didn't really have a choice.
So yesterday afternoon, after the snow finally stopped falling, I decided to get a head start with the task. Shoveling wasn't so bad because the snow was fluffy and not very hard to shovel. After a few minutes, I went to go back inside to get something.
That was when I realized the door was locked.
I effing locked myself out! No Huz. No car keys. No phone. I only had a friggin' shovel on me!!
How did I lock myself out?? I walked out the house and, out of habit, I turned the lock. It was the worst feeling in the world...realizing my mistake.
I felt like the stupid person in the world!
I started to panic. I couldn't help thinking about the direness of my situation. My husband wasn't around. I was by myself. The blizzard just ended, and there was no way a locksmith was going to be open. And if one were, it would take them hours to get to me. I never gave anyone an extra key just in case. If I wasn't crying, I would have been laughing.
Luckily, a neighbor was outside shoveling and lent me his phone. I called Tina. And started bawling. I am usually a strong person. But at that moment, I really did feel both helpless and hopeless. I didn't know what to do!
My neighbor probably thought I was a whack-a-doodle.
Tina felt so bad for me. She said she was coming to get me right away. Of course, she had to shovel her car out first, and that was going to take forever. And she had to brave the roads, which were probably not all plowed yet. Ugh!
Even though Tina was coming for me, I still had to try to find a locksmith. My neighbor had a yellow pages app on his iPhone. So I tried the first locksmith listed in my area. However, I really thought it was going to be hopeless. But I had to try.
The phone rang a couple times, and someone actually picked up! Couldn't believe it. I told him the situation and asked if he could come out that day. He responded that he just needed to dust off his car a little and should be over in 15 minutes. I couldn't believe my luck.
I was the luckiest unluckiest person ever! First losing my car and finding my car the night before. And then this.
While waiting for the locksmith to come, I continued shoveling, which is what I was going to do anyway. Before I was even finished, he came and let me in.
It was a hell of a weekend. But I came out unscathed...only just with a little less money in my pocket. But that's not bad at all. I can't complain.
I had plans with a friend last night that I didn't want to cancel. Plus I didn't believe that the weather was going to be as bad as they say. Blizzard? Yeah right. My firm even closed early in anticipation of the snow. I laughed! Like really. The snow was purportedly supposed to start in the afternoon. There wasn't any snow even when I left work.
At my friend's house, we made and ate dinner, and it still hadn't started snowing yet. We even started a movie, and still no snow. Then later in the night, we finally see it. There was already 2-3 inches on the ground. I for some reason wasn't worried. Bah, whatever, I thought. Let's finish watching the movie, and then I'll head out.
By the time I left his house, there was a lot more snow on the ground. I was walking to my car to drive home. But there was only one problem. My car was gone.
I didn't realize I parked on a snow emergency route. All cars on that road had been towed. My friend said that they sometimes just move the car to another street. I really hoped that was the case because the alternative was a lot worse--that my car was impounded, which would really effing suck.
So we set out in search of my car. I pressed my car alarm every time I saw a silver car. "Here car car," I said. We only walked a few blocks, and I had a sort of feeling about this one street. So I insisted we try it. The next moment, I heard the sweet sound of my car alarm. Yes!!
However, by this time, the snow was really falling. I knew the ride home was not going to be fun. I didn't live very close either. Probably more than 30 miles away.
I drove not one minute before I realized that driving home was probably a baaaaddd idea. But I was determined to get home. I wanted desperately to be home.
I also wanted to live, so I took my time. I didn't drive any faster than 30 mph. Yes, I realize that is slow. But I didn't want to risk going any faster.
My heart was pounding. My palms were sweaty, and my body was rigid. I was a nervous wreck. Slowly but surely, I made my way home. I made it alive!! I only had to endure one long tortuous hour of terror, stress, and every other horrible emotion you can imagine. But I was home!!
All I could think was, "That was the stupidest thing I've ever f**king done!" Never again.
You'd think I was done doing stupid things. Well, then you'd be wrong. The story unfortunately doesn't end there.
I got caught with my pants down! Well, not literally. Huz's co-workers came over this weekend. And I wasn't thinking at all. Because the next minute, Huz's co-worker said, "It's still Christmas?"
OMG! The friggin' Christmas tree was up...and still is. I forget that people don't usually keep their tree up until February. So I didn't even notice...didn't even really think about it. How embarrassing.
Then immediately after that I started looking at my house as an outsider. Suddenly, all the mess and the flaws were highlighted for me. Here are the thoughts that ran through my head:
Oh, God, the coffee table is covered with crap. We are pigs! Ahhh! The dining room isn't furnished, and we've lived here for two years. They must think we are weirdos.
We don't have any paintings or pictures up. Our house must look so dull and uninviting. Ugh!
Oh, crap, I left my feminine napkins out in the bathroom.
Ewww, my turtle tank needs to be cleaned...badly.
I'm not usually conscious of these things. I come home and go about my business. I tidy up but only one in a while. We have been thinking about furnishing the dining room and decorating our house for months. Keyword is "thinking." We just haven't gotten around to it.
Huz's co-workers didn't even go in the basement or upstairs. Thank goodness. In the basement, they would find Huz's hockey gear spread out on the floor getting aired out. Upstairs, they'd find our third bedroom empty except for a shelf and random boxes. And there are clothes (mostly Huz's) all over the floor of the master bedroom. *sheepish*
Even though our house isn't perfect. I still love it here. I feel comfortable here. It's the home that I share with the man that I love. Yeah, it needs some improvement. Hopefully, it'll happen soon. But until then, I'll continue enjoying my Christmas tree way past Christmas.
The new and final season of Lost starts tonight! I'm so excited. I have followed this show through thick and thin and will finally see it pay off. Well, that's the hope at least.
Usually by the time a new season starts, I've already completely forgotten the last season. So being the great husband that he is, Huz found a 8-minute clip that recaps everything. I'm sure I am not the only one, so here it is.
After every episode and after every season, I have more questions than answers. Supposedly all of the big questions will be answered this season. Yay!
Here are some of those questions:
Spoiler alert!
1. Is Juliet really dead? Why did the screen flash white instead of black? 2. Who is Jacob really? 3. Who is the man in black? Is Locke really dead? 4. What is up with Richard Alpert? How old is he really? How has he lived so long? 5. What is Ilana's story? What are Ilana and company up to? 6. Will Jin and Sun finally be reunited? 7. Will Kate end up with Jack or Sawyer? 8. What happens to Desmond? Sayid? Claire? Hurley? Eloise? Miles? 9. Did Jack's plan to change the future actually work? 10. Will everyone get their happy ending?
I have more questions but just can't think of any more now. =p
Here are some ultimate questions that may never be answered. Who knows? - How did the island come to be exactly? - Why can the island travel in time? - Why is Ben such a sonabitch? - Why is Sawyer such a hottie?
Aren't my nails pureetttyy? Aren't my wedding rings blingin'?
I should be a hand model. Don't you agree??
I do exclusively french tip on my nails. Even when I was younger, I've always admired pretty manicured hands with french tip. I think it looks sophisticated. Don't you?
You may be surprised to know that my nails are real and that I did them myself. Yup, it's true. And no, I never worked at a nail salon or anything like that. I'm just very talented, ya know. ;)
You don't know how many times I find out that someone thinks my nails are fake. What? Really??
Well, I guess I am lucky. I have good nails. I get it from my mom.
I do have to admit something though. I'm surprised how nice my hands look in the pictures from my blackberry. You can't tell that they are dry as heck. Haha. I basically have crocodile skin. Oh, well, at least my nails are pretty.
